I have a morning routine-ish. It's more that I'm not willing to jump immediately out of bed. (Even though I slept TEN HOURS last night.) So, I grab my trusty macbook air, check email, FB, and message Nate if I know he's awake. This has lasted an hour today. I feel like so much happens while I'm sleeping that I need time to catch up on it.

I read a lot of blogs - although I recently shed a lot from my feedly because I wasn't actually reading them. Partially because there is no time. Partially because I still don't love using feedly. Partially because they no longer apply to me. And, when something is taking up space in your life, it should be something you're passionate about - a blog, a job, a person, etc.

Anyway, yesterday I read this article about being crazy rather than boring. It struck a chord with me because I've been crying a lot recently over a lot of different things and I wonder if that's normal, if I'm crazy or does it even matter? I'm in the middle of struggle of do I continue to speak up or keep my mouth shut?

"I'd rather be this girl, the girl who is committed to forgive, and love, and move, and act, and let go, push forward and believe even when it doesn't make sense to believe; even if it means being disappointed, even if it means being hurt, again and again."

But honestly, both sides are difficult. It's not easy being crazy. And it's not easy being quiet. I also wonder, is being crazy being selfish? Is being quiet just being weak?

I would love to know what you all think on this subject - comment, email, text, etc.

xo.

“We desire to possess a beauty that is worth pursuing, worth fighting for, a beauty that is core to who we truly are. We want beauty that can be seen; beauty that can be felt; beauty that affects others; a beauty all our own to unveil.”  

- Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul

A friend of mine shared this video yesterday and it made me think a lot. I would certainly say the most difficult part of life is being REAL - being authentically, unapologetically you. Not just with others, but oftentimes with ourselves. I didn't need a video to tell me this, but I needed the video as a reminder. (It's one that is sometimes needed daily.)

It's ok to feel the way you feel when you feel it. It's ok to share that with others. If they are worth caring about, then they will listen and not judge you. It's always important to have perspective, but it's not ok to compare your issues with the issues of others. Comparison is the thief of joy.

Your journey is your journey. Your difficulties are difficult.

And if your favorite pajamas are purple with fish and you want a pancake and you want the world to know, then let the world know.

Well, everyone here knows about my meltdown this week. Meltdown. Breakthrough. Learning. It doesn't matter what word I use to describe it, I can honestly say it was a humbling and necessary experience. It's caused me to be a little more introverted over the last seven days, but it has certainly made me hyper aware of how blessed my life is.

And, as if that wasn't enough, it made room for me to hear from God. 

So, I will tell you the story...

This morning, I met Nate at City Church. I was late. We drove separately because I had to go to work afterward. On my way, I had to stop to get gas because my little light was flashing, then I got stopped by the drawbridge from James Island to West Ashley. Anxiety followed by defeat. But I got there during worship. I drank my coffee and listened to the message - sort of. My head was floating with life things - thinking of the past week, the one to come, and what I have been feeling and needing personally. So, I guess I wasn't really listening at all. (Sorry, Todd!) But, at the end of the message, the Pastor spoke to us about the prophetic prayer team at St. Andrew's. They usually meet on Mondays or Tuesdays to pray and receive knowledge from the Lord, then they pray for discernment, etc. At the main campus of St. Andrew's, they share these prophetic messages on Sunday, but never had before at City Church. This was their first week and they had seven to share.

They seemed specific yet vague, but full of hope for someone. Until we got to message six:

"For someone who had a meltdown this week. The Lord reminds you that He is on your side. It is your Father's greatest pleasure to help you."

And it my head all I could think was "Me. Me. Me. He's talking to me." So, I approached a prayer team member for prayer - I didn't really know what to expect out of it and I didn't really know what to pray for. Then, the man praying for me asked, "Do you feel like God is telling you anything?" I said, "I feel like he's just telling me I already know what I need to know and I need to trust him. Just to trust him." We finished praying and I sat back down. 

It's so hard sometimes for me to discern what are words from God or what are words I'm creating.  I sat there just thinking, what do I do? What is my next step? The pastor (who I haven't spoken to personally in over a week) came back up to give us some words and a closing prayer and he said,

"I just have this vision of someone who is driving with their gas light blinking on their way to the station. They're wondering if they're going to make it. Will they make it to get full and refreshed? And God is saying to them, 'Trust me. Trust me. Trust me.'"

Point taken.

When you feel like you're not sure what you're worth or what you're supposed to be doing - God is going to chase after you. Maybe it will be a thought. Maybe it will be a meltdown. Maybe a scripture. And, maybe, if you're like me and haven't been listening, it will be two public displays of prophetic words where He's saying, "I am here. I've been waiting for you. And I'm not going to let you feel lost anymore."

I learned something new about myself this week.

It wasn't fun. It involved a lot of tears. It's going to involve some struggle.

I haven't been sharing as much about the inside of my head because mostly I've been pretty good. I know who I am, what I stand for, where I am going. (Sort of.) I changed jobs in June - that was a BIG deal, but I genuinely felt led to do that. I loved my Apple family, but I was no longer finding value in my job. Since then, it's been a roller coaster of life and learning a new j.o.b.

I've been doing a good job. I am successful at what I do. I love the women I work with who amaze me every single day. I love our guests who are up to crazy things. I find it unbelievable that I get to play on social media with more purpose than ever before. I like sweating all over the city and making friends wherever I go.

But, for some reason, it hasn't felt like enough in my head. I'm doing too much learning. I'm not doing enough of the right things. I'm not looking to charge up a ladder like I have been at every other job in my life. I've said no to work in efforts to keep personal life promises. Honestly, that's strange. I've spent the last 12 years of my life focused solely on working hard and making money. Multiple jobs. Overtime. Skipping some big life events. And now, well, my priorities have shifted.

When I look forward 10 years, the first thing I think about is no longer my job. It's my (soon to be) husband. It's our home. It's our family. It's our life sprinkled with the things I enjoy - yoga and coffee and blogging.

For so long, I found my value and self-worth in my career. And now I don't.  And I'm having a really hard time accepting it because I'm not sure where to look for it.

Ok, ok. I know where to find it. In Him. I'm fearfully and wonderfully made. He has come so that we may have life and have it abundantly!

I just have to focus on that. His love. His promises. His future He has planned for me. It's not about my career. It's not even about me. It's about Him.

Note: My boss is actually the one who helped me come to the realization and encouraged me to share it with the team! The support I receive both professionally & personally from my work family is amazing - and how I know I'm exactly where I need to be!

This morning at church the pastor said, "There are two types of people who ride roller coasters. The first is the kind who holds on like this [gripping tightly]. The second is the kind who holds on like this [hands up in the air]. The first kind is holding onto anything they can to give themselves a sense that they are more secure even though they're not. The second has their hands up because they know they are secure."

Wow. Reality check.

Fear is a manipulative emotion that can trick us 
into leading a boring life. - Donald Miller

I don't want to lead a boring life. I want my life to be full of goals that are crushed, relationships that thrive, and lots of coffee because there's not always enough time for sleep.

Storyline Conference 2014. I'm coming for you.

All Day Fall Day 2013!

This month, I'm really trying to be me - like the REAL me. I've been saying no when I need to say no and yes when I want to say yes. I've been drinking Granny Apple Cider because it's fall and I like it. I bought big colorful sunglasses because I thought it was a good idea. I've been unapologetic about my feelings and have cried when I need to cry and been silent when that was key. I have spent hours cleaning because it makes me feel good. I bought bags of Lindt truffles to treat myself with. I have visited friends from near and far. I'm still figuring out pieces of my job and they're continually giving me space to ebb and flow. I haven't worked out in almost two weeks, but have found rest and am ready to amp it back up. I am trying to tell the people around me how much I enjoy their company because they're pretty fantastic individuals. I sleep with my windows open and my fan on so I can snuggle up under my anthropologie quilt. I've spent a lot of time in my car blasting music with the windows rolled down and the fall breeze whipping through my hair. I visited the site of my future wedding again and was filled with anticipation of being Mrs. Taylor. I rescheduled my days to account for a visit to the pumpkin patch. I've started reading through some beloved blogs and listening to Joy the Baker podcasts again. I'm remembering the things that I love and give me joy. Sometimes it's hard to be yourself, so I'm trying to reflect on these things now - hoping that I don't let them fall by the wayside again.

What are you doing that brings you joy?
What are you really into during this fall season?

xo.

My heart is full of joy.

Yesterday, one of my dearest friends, Megan, was in town for less than 24 hours, but it was one of the best whirlwind trips. I'm so lucky to have someone in my life who I can fall in and out of routine with easily. She's the type of friend who can finish my sentences and understand why I am frustrated or happy without my having to explain. She can drink insane amounts of caffeine and power through jet leg to walk on the beach and eat burgers with me.

And that's what life is about... Creating moments and memories with those around you.

It's not a race. It's not a checklist. It's just love.

Spring is a time of refreshing and new growth. Everyone knows that.

But what is fall?

To me, fall is a time of steadfastness. To know who you are and charge forward.

But do we know who we are in an ever changing environment? Is our confidence at a level that can withstand the season and hold fast through the winter?

It's so frustrating to struggle. You feel alone or misunderstood. But you're not. Every person around you is feeling the same things, dealing with the same problems and questions. So, why don't we talk about it?

Do we feel too different Do we think admission is a sign of weakness?

The only way we can move through life is together.

But it starts within you. You are enough.

I am enough.

It's possible that I overextended myself in September. Or, as my friend Parker said, I was burning the candle at 20 different ends.

So, October is a month for renewal. Fall is my favorite season. October is one of my favorite months. This year, I will use it to find joy and renewed energy.

"... in October, everybody walks around with a certain energy as if they are going to be elected president the next day, as if they are going to get married." (Donald Miller)

I started by meditating for just one minute this morning and reading a story from the book, Cold Tangerines.

"Today, humble Today, presents itself to us with all the ceremony and bling of a glittering diamond ring: Wear me, it says. Wear me out. Love me, dive into me, discover me, it pleads with us." (Shauna Niequist)

Slow and steady wins the race.

xo.

I am a pretty organized person. I have an iPhone and a day planner that I use constantly. My calendars are shared with my fiancé and my sweat schedule is posted for co-workers to see, join, or hold me accountable. Planning and organizing means you get to see everyone and do everything and not forget things. Great!

The problem is life cannot be planned and organized. The hings in life can be, but life itself cannot. Life has curveballs - health issues, schedule changes, weather conditions. Those things that knock or your loved ones out of whack. They turn you and your day planner upside down.

That is just the way it is.

I am trying to learn to deal with these things as they come. I'm getting better, but there are still usually tears involved.

I wonder what would happen if I spent a month doing no planning other than work? Is that a ridiculous challenge to take on?

I guess the most important thing to remember is to get back up when life knocks you down. That's what I do in yoga. Fall out of the posture? Try again. Life won't stop. Why should you?

I'm finishing up my "weekend". I'm a Friday/Saturday off girl, so I'm enjoying my last day off for the
week. It's been pretty fantastic, if I do say so myself.

Nate Date Day was yesterday! We spent the whole day together being tourists in our own town at the Firefly Distillery followed by lunch at one of our favorite places - Black Bean Company! We did yoga at Mission and vegged out to several episodes of Hell's Kitchen. It's nice to have a real day off with your love.

Today, I ran around downtown and Mt. P doing some grocery shopping, coffee drinking, etc. I always forget about The Vegetable Bin, but it's such a nice, quiet alternative to the Farmer's Market AND it's open all week. At home, I made a delicious batch of Shutterbean's Killer Granola and now I'm hanging out with Roxy Pants on the couch while my lovely Sangria Rewined candle burns on the table. Also, having a Granny Smith Cider. Don't judge. It's my day off.

It's almost time to do dishes, make dinner, watch football, etc. But for now, I'm just enjoying.

September is going to be busy.

I'm starting a personal bikram yoga challenge - three times per week so I can REALLY give it a chance and understand the benefits. Also, I'm starting a Yin Yoga Series for four weeks. AND Nate and I are starting the Alpha Program at Crosstowne.

Talk about a jam packed month! But if there is one thing I've learned, there's no better time than now. Let's just see if I get burnt out...

Until next time, think sweet, pumpkiny fall thoughts! xo.

September is full. Let's try again in October.

xo.

Fall is coming!

I can feel it in the air.
I can smell it in Bath & Body Works.
I can taste it at Starbucks.

Soon.

But for now, I will get up and make pumpkin paleo pancakes for me + my love before yoga and pretend that we've  already settled into fall.

 The getting out of bed is the hard part. I really love lying here, reading what everyone is doing across the country in blogland, and feeling the cool breeze through my window.

Ok. 1.2.3. Go!

Listening to: Paramore: Ain't It Fun

Breathe it all in. 
Love it all out.

Three days off will give you a lot of perspective.

on work/life balance.
on community.
on productivity.
on God.
on quality time.
on food.
on exercise.
on friends.
on responsibility.
on sleep.

I just wonder. What's really most important to you? How do prioritize/balance it all? It's such a delicate juggling act.

Dear Harper,

You, my sweet little nephew, are a truly a gift from God. Your little baby person sparks such love in everyone who meets you. Your teeny baby features are miraculous and adorable. I love every piece of you. Right now, you sleep a lot and cuddle up in my arms when I'm holding you. It leaves me without words how precious you are all bundled up against me. One day, you'll grow up and be too big for cuddles, but we'll spend time together playing at the beach and Uncle Nate will teach you to surf. I'll be sure to put SPF all over you, but I'll balance it by spoiling you with ice cream and letting you stay up late. We're going to have so much fun! I can't wait to see your life unfold.

I love you oh so well.

xo.

Auntie Erin

"In the process of committing to something bigger than I had ever challenged myself to before, I have discovered more than I ever dreamed. I’ve learned to manage time more effectively, I’ve learned how to say “yes” and how to say “no”. I’ve discovered that in order to achieve a goal, you actually have to be in action at all times." - the wunder year

This girl has been blogging for the last 207 days (give or take a few) and is headed for 365. That's crazy pants. (Crazy wunder unders. Ha!) I had a difficult time with 100 days. I'm not saying it's easy for her (it's not) or that it's always interesting for me to read (it's not) but I am so impressed with her goal that I continue to check it every few days in my Feedly. Some days I skim over the words and some days I soak them all in, turn them over in my heart and share them in my own posts or conversations. 

Her words in this post were just so true - full of personal responsibility & grace - that I had to bring them over here for us all to have.

And action.

Geez. You know what's hard? Life.

And you know who it's hard for? Errybody.

Yeah. Let's be honest, here. Life is hard for everyone. You know how I've come to that conclusion? I know a lot of people who know a lot of people and everyone's having problems. Financial issues. Relationship issues. Self issues. Job issues. Eating issues. Healthy issues. So, no, it's not just you. Welcome to the club.

What do we do in this club?

Take shit one day at a time.

Smile when you can. Cry when you need.

I've been thinking a lot about the stresses I feel and how I am in control of them. Will I/Should I always be able to control them? Not always. But I have the freedom to choose how I deal with things. I have the freedom to say yes or no. I have the freedom to over/under schedule myself. I have the freedom to change my course. I have the freedom to change my pattern of behavior. I have the freedom to be free from stress & guilt that I put on myself. I have the freedom to be released from these toxic holds over my mind, my heart, my body.

I've been continuing this soul detox devotion (faithfully this week) and was able to go back to yoga. And it's also been a chocolate eating week. It's been emotional. I'm learning how to meditate this upcoming week and it will be my first week without work email on my phone. This will probably also be emotional. (Sorry, Nate!)

But I'm gonna take this shit one day at a time.
(Except for the part that needs planning.)

Because, in the long run, we're all just learning and tumbling through these days - this life - together.

Speak uplifting words.
Speak truth.
Speak love.

And when you eff it up. Give yourself some grace.

That's my rambling for the week. xo.

This afternoon's companions. Plus, Bob Dylan.

Today.

Today, I am so thankful for my job and for the challenges it has faced me with. I am so thankful to have a partner, a better half, to support me through this time of change and adjustment. I am so thankful to have grace and freedom on my side. I am so thankful for positivity. I am so thankful for sharing and caring; for not stopping, but constantly moving forward. I am so thankful for the goals I have and my ability to charge after them. I am so thankful for hard work rather than luck. I am so thankful for opportunities to fail forward and learn for myself and for others. I am so thankful for the constant reminder to speak life-giving words to those around me; to uplift and heal rather than stomp and wound. I am so thankful for all of the crabs lifting me out of the pot.

Today. I am so thankful.

From my Soul Detox devotion:

"Our words are powerful. They have the power to kill and the power to give life. Throughout the book of Proverbs, Solomon often writes about the dangers and the life-giving abilities of our words. He was very aware of the power of words. As a result, Solomon encourages us all to be aware of the types of words we speak to others and the positive and negative affects they can have.

What types of words do you tend to speak most - toxic or life-giving?"

Something for us all to think about.

xo.

July is gonna be bonkers amazing. I can feel it.

On average, 3 out of 5 days of work don't require me to be anywhere by 7am. Sure, it leaves me with less free hours in the evening, but I'm pretty sure this shift has been fantastic for my mind and body. 

I don't stress out about being in bed by 9pm (although I often find myself headed there). I don't stress out about saying no to hangs with people because I'm stressing out about being in bed by 9pm. I don't stress out about waking up in enough time to get everything done because I'm trying to squeeze in hours of sleep. I don't stress out about setting an alarm because I naturally wake up between 6:30 and 7am most days. I don't stress out about spending money at Starbucks because I have time to make my own cup of coffee at home. (I may even put the keurig into hibernation.) 

I am actually averaging 7 hours and 54 minutes of sleep throughout the week. (Thanks for the numbers UP band! Goal is 8. Body loves 9.) I can feel stress levels lessen about a lot due to this fact. It's making me healthier!

It's so lovely.

Sleep is good.

And now I'm rolling in the blogs.

My Vision + Goals! #possibility

As you all know, I began a new job recently - hooray! Change is exciting and challenging (in a good way)! But, we also know change can be overwhelming... Eep. And, since you all know me, you know that I put a lot of pressure on myself to do and be everything quickly. I give others the space and time to learn, but not myself. (How rude, right?)

So, what I've learned so far from my new job is:

1. Don't pressure yourself into being/doing more than you're ready to be/do. It takes time and that's ok - take it.

2. If you're gonna be up to Big Shit, then sometimes you have to let go of the little shit. Say no when you need to. Skip a workout if you have to. You can't do it all, but you can do it big.

3. It's all about people. Being in community is the greatest gift. Do not waste it.

Anyway, those are just a few things that have been on my mind recently as I adjust to my new job which I really feel is a new life. I'm certainly learning from it everyday and I hope that never ever stops.

xo.

Yesterday, the love of my life turned 27 years old. I am so blessed to have such a man in my life and to be able to spend another 27+ years with him. I love you oh so well, Nate.

"1 universe, 9 planets, 204 countries, 809 islands, 7 seas, and I had the privilege to meet you."

Things to do in June:

Start (& learn) new job! #iamconfident
Celebrate Nate's 27th birthday - it's tomorrow!
Drink 48 ounces of h2o erry'day - eventually I'll get to 64.
Read The Catcher in the Rye (since I was somehow never required).
Clean out the little closet (funny how it has the most stuff...)
Use my Pure Barre groupon + take a friend!
Try a new yoga studio - Holy Cow or Mission Yoga, perhaps?
Use Jawbone UP band - tell me what you love about yours, please!
Look into buying a bike.

For you to do?

Hold me accountable/join me!
(Write your own list if you want.)
Read this.
And this.
Leave me a comment/send a text/email.

Thanks for reading, friends. xo.

When did life become so much work? I mean, really, do we take the time to really enjoy what we we've been given? The last two days I've been "unemployed"aka between my old job and new job. These last two days I've been busy though. Planning. Cleaning. Cooking. Thinking. I got to go to the beach and nap with my love. I was able to organize and plan some things. I was able to have drinks with a friend. I got to catch up with a friend on the other side of the country. I had delicious breakfast with a friend and her family.

So much to be grateful for, but, in the moments, I was very overwhelmed. I was overwhelmed about planning, about ramifications, about sustaining relationships, about sunburn, about a whole host of things that were or could have been a result of my actions. Thinking and worrying all the time is a lot of work. I ask again, when did life become so much work?

As I start my new job, this new life adventure, I feel called to learn how to enjoy it now. Not in hindsight. Not in ten years. Now.

For June, I've started to come up with a list of things I'd like to do - to enjoy and help simplify. As soon as it's complete (tomorrow, likely) I will post it here.

There is so much possibility in our lives. We should absolutely take hold of it and live it now.

Hey, Google Reader users!

It's our beloved Reader's last month in business. Womp. Womp.

Instead of waiting until the last minute (like I would have), Nate was kind enough to back up my subscriptions and find me a few substitutes to roll my reading into:

Feedly: Not just for your computer, but a way to integrate your blog roll seamlessly into your mobile devices. It's minimalist view is appealing to those who dig white space. I'm thinking I would like it more if I had an iPad. *hint hint*

The Old Reader: So, Google Reader isn't gone? It's just changed colors and name? Definitely missing the design appeal and mobile features - The Old Reader is old school and that's alright by me.

Flipboard: This is a mobile only option. Don't try flipping through these virtual pages on your computer. But if the iPad is your jam, then get crackin'. Although I have heard Zite is just like Flipboard, but minus a lot of the social media.

So, the choice is yours! Just figure it out before July 1 when we have to pour one out for Google Reader...

(Let me know if you have a favorite and I'll try it out, too. I'm not techy, I'm just bloggy. I need all the help I can get!)

Worth Reading: RSS Isn't Dead

Maybe you had to work today. Maybe it was a paid holiday. Maybe you barbecued with your family. Maybe you went for a walk with your love. Maybe you had a bad day. Maybe you can't remember a better day.

No matter what this Memorial Day has held for you... Remember.

Right wing. Left wing. Somewhere in the middle. Remember the men & women who died while bravely serving you and your country.

"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." - George Orwell

This is Day 97 of 100 Days of Blogging.

What did you do with YOUR Saturday night?!

Also, what did you do with your Sunday? I started playing with photoshop, so maybe you'll be seeing some fancier looking photos coming your way :)

This is Day 96 of 100 Days of Blogging.

What a wonderful Saturday this has been so far...

This morning I went to Warm Flow at Charleston Community Yoga with two of my loveliest lady friends. Our teacher was a sub - totally different flow than a normal Saturday, but I laughed out loud at Melanie's witty remarks. Yoga doesn't have to be so serious!

Then I went around town to Target and Trader Joe's. And, upon getting home, the sweet sound of live jazz was filling the block. Piano + Saxophone. The best soundtrack to Saturday cleaning. Now my house smells like lemon + lavender and has fresh flowers about it.

(PS. See that "vase"? We're going to be using these vintage blue Ball mason jars to decorate for our wedding! Just testing one out...)

I read a lot about my new job at lulu. I learned a lot about the company. I'm so excited to get started!

Now, I'm waiting for my love to get off work, so we can get pumped for tonight's Go Glow Run! Nothing like 3 miles of walking/running around in dark while you and your friends wear glow sticks. Right?

Oh hey - we saw The Great Gatsby last night. It was good. Not great. I think my expectations were too high for the film, but the soundtrack is awesome!

What are you doing on this lovely weekend?

This is Day 95 out of 100 Days of Blogging.

credit: chasejarvis.com

I recently accepted a position working for lululemon athletica on King Street. It was a really difficult decision to leave the team I am currently working with, but I am thrilled about this opportunity - to be able to work for a company that is passionate about community and health both worldwide and locally.

The more people I tell at my current job, the more I feel confident leaving a team that I have impacted. From tears to hugs of joy, I know that we have all truly been a support for one another - professionally & personally. And, when I tell them where I'm going, I love hearing them say, "Most perfect job for Erin, ever? Yes."

So, here's to new opportunities!

If you're in a period of transition, I hope you feel as excited and supported as I do. And, if you feel stuck where you are, then change it. Shake it up.

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."

This is Day 92 of 100 Days of Blogging.

I just got home from sunrise yoga with my love. And now I'm post-yoga baking some oatmeal cookies before work.

How lucky am I for these things? For a love that supports me and my health. For a home & bed to wake up in. For a studio & teacher that wakes up early to stretch my mind & body. For a kitchen full of food. For sweet baked treats to eat & share with those I love. For a job that pays my bills & pushes me to new challenges.

As I think upon these things, my heart breaks for Oklahoma and I pray for those who have lost so much this week.

xo.

This is Day 91 of 100 Days of Blogging.

It's amazing to me the wisdom and freedom God will provide you with when you ask.

I recently had a big decision to make. And, well, I literally could not make it. I was torn in two pieces over some pro/con lists. So, I prayed for a sign - some way to know I was making the right decision.

And it came - in the form of a blog post I read.

(Clearly, God knows how to get my attention.)

At the end of the post, it reads, "What big, scary and audacious things are you getting up to this year?" And, as soon as I read it, I knew that was my answer. My surprisingly bold sign.

This is Day 89 of 100 Days of Blogging.

This is Day 82 of 100 Days of Blogging.

Today is Mother's Day. I'm not a mother, so I'm no expert on the matter, but I do have a mother, so I suppose I'm allowed some say on the holiday.

My relationship with my mother hasn't always been what it is now. (The now being one of my closest friends and confidantes.)  She had to overcome a lot of her own struggles before she could help us overcome any of our own. There were times when I thought I hated her. (Using the "h word" is the quickest way to break a mother's heart.) There were times when I thought she was magical creature sent to make life easy. (Something akin to unicorn, but in a practical, opposable thumbs sort of way.) Growing up, well... It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

I mean, really, we have we been through some stuff. (Together, of course, because that's how mothers and daughters go through things.) Happiness. Tears. Stress. Graduations. Loves. Lost loves. New loves. Rants. Responsibility. Traumas. Death. You name it. We've seen and/or lived it.

I realized today that I can't yet fathom what any of those things feel like as mother. It's an intense concern, love and binding that I haven't yet experienced. But, the more I love my fiancé and the more I understand what that love means, the more I understand all of the decisions and choices my mother made in the past - for herself, for her husband, for her family.

This morning, I was reading Proverbs 31 and it made me realize even more how much my mom has done and continues to do for her family and the people she meets. Being a wife and mother is the most important and difficult job that you can take on in life! so.much.responsibility.to.everyone.

Today, let us celebrate those brave and wonderful women who raised us! Their love for us knows no bounds.

To my mom - I love you oh so well. And I am oh so glad to have learned life & love from you. I hope I am able to impact this world even half as much as you have.

"Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." (Proverbs 31)

Today is Day 81 of 100 Days of Blogging.

I am ready to revert back to my goal setting ways. To-do lists & whatnot. I don't want to make it stressful for

myself, but I don't feel like I am achieving what I wish to be achieving - professionally or personally. I'm making strides. I'm certainly being productive. But, recently, I've had one of those moments... a wake up call... that says "Hey you! You are not where you'd like to be." So, let's change it. I have control over what I do, where I go, who I affect, how I feel. I just need to take the reins again.

Also, I've been trolling the interwebs for good words and ideas to motivate myself (and maybe you, too!). I read a billion blog posts to pull out the best ones to share. Here are the ones that have touched me recently:

"So tonight I lay on the beach. And as I watched the sun slip below the horizon I realized that tomorrow is another day. I may not have been getting it all right lately, but if I’m going to get to where I want to be, that has got to be okay." Such good, true, freeing words from the wunder year.

Minimize. Stop collecting things in your life that you don't need. (Physical or otherwise.) Also, just read this whole blog. 

Dear Moms in My Life, You know I love you because I will be making you this dish on Mother's Day. Love has no greater gift than cheese + carbs.

I love Elise. I love her honesty. I love her California life. I love her green thumb. I cannot obtain a west coast life style at the moment, but maybe I can keep my plants alive with this post on raising indoor plants.

And last, but certainly not least,

Drink more water. For everything you've ever wanted to be healthier or better about your life. Here are 50 + Ways to kick up your H20. (My tip: get a bottle, tervis, cup that you just love. I drink more water because my tumbler has funny little goldfish.)

Time to start my day, friends. Thanks for reading. xo.

This is Day 77 of 100 Days of Blogging.

“It is always the simple things that change our lives. And these things never happen when you are looking for them to happen. Life will reveal answers at the pace life wishes to do so. You feel like running, but life is on a stroll. This is how God does things.” Donald Miller

I've been spending a lot of time here.

That is all.

xo.

I'm so overwhelmed by wedding + work these days. I guess I can't leave out sinus pressure + breaking household appliances + car dents. How do people get through life without being born millionaires? I mean, really. I sometimes have a hard time getting through one day without some sort of financial freak out.

So there's that.

But there's also goal setting. There's also budgeting. There's also making up your damn mind to goal set and budget toward something. (cough *Hawaiian Honeymoon* cough)

And sometimes you just have to run with it.

[Much like life...]

"Running is just falling forward and catching yourself. Try it." - the wunder year

This is Day 68 of 100 Days of Blogging.

Wedding Color Inspiration by MudHandChan

This is Day 64 of 100 Days of Blogging.

photo credit

This is Day 56 of 100 Days of Blogging. I haven't been committed to it though. I think that's obvious to all of you. My apologies. My apologies to you for setting an expectation I didn't follow through on. My apologies to me for spending so much time trying to do and be what and who I thought I was supposed to do and be... when really all I wanted to do was 100 Days of Blogging.

I haven't decided yet if today was the worst day ever or just a big wake up call. Nevertheless, it has been utterly disappointing. And today I will wallow. I just finished The Fault In Our Stars - providing both sadness and a perspective shift. Now, I will eat Chickfila or boxed macaroni cheese or something equally unhealthy. I will order new shoes to try and make my feet happy. I will lie around feeling defeated. I will try to focus on anything other than the pounding coming from my head, but will eventually be defeated at that, so I'll take a nap. I will pity party all the live long day.

I can do that and write about it and talk about it because I know today is not the end of the world. My life and hope cannot actually be defeated. And pity parties are excellent excuses to eat waffle fries and start over tomorrow.

And if you're having the same sort of day as me, then I hope you find some sort of solace in my post and some sort hope in this other post I stumbled upon today.

Take a deep breath and try showing yourself some grace today. If you feel like you're behind, just know you're not, and enjoy your story wherever it is. And trust that no matter what time zone you might be in right now, the sun will come up.

Photo Credit: Katie Gandy

Yes, that's me! Yes, I said yes! Yes, I am so very happy and excited and a whole host of other adjectives! Yes, this is my favorite blog post ever! 

Oh my goodness - so much has been happening! And right now I should be putting away my laundry or doing some dishes, but I am dedicated to writing this post. Also, I hate putting away laundry and doing dishes.

Yoga. Easter. Kittens. Family. CSA. Cookies. His & Hers donuts. Toms. Chipotle. Oil change. Thug Kitchen. And so on and so forth. The best way to keep up with it all would be to look at my instagram or hack into my iMessages. (Please don't do the latter.)

What I am going to write today, however, is going to be about cookies. The Perfect Single Serving Cookies (for eating two or sharing). Here we go!

I was having a dilemma the other day after work. Should I:

a. go to yoga
b. take a nap
c. eat a cookie

What I really wanted was both b and c, but I convinced myself that I wanted c more and if I was going to eat a cookie, then I needed to go to yoga. So, a and c. Then the dilemma of, do I bake an entire batch of cookies or buy a cookie? Never fear! Pinterest to the rescue! This recipe caught my eye and here is my rendition of it:

Ingredients:
2 tablespoons (about halfway melted) butter
2 firmly packed tablespoons light brown sugar
1 tablespoon of white sugar
A pinch of salt
1/4 teaspoon pure vanilla extract (don't skimp)
1 egg yolk (I don't care what you do with the white)
1/4 teaspoon of baking soda
1/4 ish cup of All-Purpose flour (ish means more in this case)
3 heaping tablespoons of dark chocolate chips

1. In a cereal sized bowl, mix butter and sugars. (I used a fork.)
2. Add egg yolk and vanilla. Mix again.
3. Add the salt, baking soda and flour. Mix. If your dough seems runny, add a wee bit of flour.
4. Stir in those yummy dark chocolate morsels.
5. Form two cookie dough mounds on a baking sheet. (My dough was too sticky for rolling into balls.) And make sure they are several inches apart because are cookies are going to be sizable!
6. Bake for about 12 minutes at 350 degrees. Until they are nice and golden all over.
7. Remove baking sheet. Give it a nice little drop on the counter to deflate the cookies. Let cool.
8. Enjoy!

We made these two nights in a row because they were so simple and SO DELICIOUS. And then there's no guilt involved because you ate a dozen freshly baked cookies because you only have two. (Crisis averted!)

If you try them out then, let me know what you think! And if you adapt them, then I'd love to know what changes you made, too!

This is Day (Something. I'll do the math later) of 100 Days of Blogging.

Thanks for sticking with me :)

Hey Interwebs!

It's certainly not that I haven't been thinking about you these past three days. I've thought about this blog every.single.day. I just haven't had the time to sit down and type. And that's ok.

Everyday, I went to work at 7am. Everyday, I left somewhere between 4 and 5. Everyday, I went to yoga. Well, Wednesday, I cleaned and put away laundry and went for the best shopping experience ever at Earthfare before visiting some friends to retrieve Brown Sugar Cinnamon Poptart ice cream and an antique sewing machine. Everyday, I've shared food and time with someone I love. Everyday, I've been in bed around 9pm.

It hasn't been crazy, but I've enjoyed every single day. Today and tomorrow are well planned, busy days, so I'm glad I had three good days to delight in.

My yoga teacher this afternoon encouraged us all to just let go of what we were thinking of - trying to guess what's next. She said, "I have my weekends well-planned by Monday afternoon. That robs me of being in the present because I'm always thinking of what's coming up." And I do the same thing. How do I stop that? Does lack of planning mean lack of productivity? Probably not. What would happen if I went a whole week without any planning? Oy. It's giving me anxiety just thinking about it!

We'll see.

Anyway, here are a few other things that have been on my radar.

This post about changing your health and your habits. I love Andrea.

High Straightenence: Organzing Your Pantry

One of the reasons why I LOVE my city.

The Most Important Part is Just Show Up.

This girl. And all of her books that I want to read. (Don't judge me.)

Well said. I'm not a parent, but we've all had these life days. It's ok.

I don't know if I'll get back here tomorrow and Sunday, but I will try my best.

xo.

This Day 37 of 100 Days of Blogging.

via Joy the Baker

It's always hard to go back to work on a Monday after two good days off, but today wasn't so bad. Not at all.

Outside of working 7-5, I've been sort of, well, lazy. I need to finish cleaning the kitchen, make tomorrow's lunch and put away laundry. Instead, I've been perusing Google Reader and Pinterest while watching Storage Wars. Have you ever watched that show? It's oddly addicting, but it seems like a lot of work to keep up with auctions, haul that junk and then resell it all. I hate keeping up with my own junk.

Speaking of my junk... Spring is here and I'm ready for some spring cleaning! Unfortunately, this constant sinus headache I've been experiencing really just makes me want to nap. I'm also ready for some spring baking - Pink Lemonade Cookies, anyone? And I'll be ordering some new, beautiful TOMS. Our CSA from Ambrose Farms starts on April 2. Spring is such an exciting time of year! It's a time for bright colors, health, freshness and newness!

Until you can get into the swing of Spring - learn to Break out of Control. And remember this - 

"People get stuck, thinking they are one kind of person, but they aren't ... The human body essentially recreates itself every six months. Nearly every cell of hair and skin and bone dies and another is directed to its former place. You are not who you were in February." - A Million Miles in a Thousand Years

This is Day 33 of 100 Days of Blogging.

Blogging is hard work. Kudos to everyone who posts daily and/or makes their living via their blog. I missed another day of my 100 days. I'll be honest, I don't feel guilty, but I do feel like I'm learning a lot about real life blogging. (Not the kind that forgets to post for months at a time...)

So, what was I doing if I wasn't blogging? Oh, well, I was in Savannah. Nbd - just visiting my dear, sweet friends - David and Faith and their kids. And the oh so enlightening Courtney and Andy. I would venture to say yesterday was both fantastically comfortable, but also a big look into what the future my hold. There was a lot of coffee and food and conversation. (We went to Starbucks, the Farmer's Market, Starland Cafe, Foxy Loxy and Green Truck!) There were also conversations about marriage, children, gardens and home ownership. Oh my, how the time flies! I suppose conversation about such things are what make us adults, yes?

That brings up an interesting topic - adulthood. When does one go from young adult to regular adult? How does one present themselves as old when their body is still young? Where does wisdom and maturity come into play and how big are their roles? I was recently told, "You don't look your age. You're nearly thirty and I'm sure you still get carded." Is thirty old? I was also told, in spite of professionalism, "You still come off as young." But then I've also been told, "I just assumed you were my age because of the way you carry yourself." How does one leverage youth and age together?

Just wondering.

Today was much different from yesterday. There wasn't much venturing out of the house. As a matter of fact, the only time we left was to go to brunch at Black Magic Cafe. (Not even the deluge of rain could keep me away from that pumpkin chai.) There was no yoga or running. There was a lot of lying around and sniffling of allergy noses. There was Game of Thrones - four episodes to be exact. Season 2 is over and I am anxiously awaiting the premiere of Season 3 next week!

There was also much time spent in the kitchen today - baking protein bars and cooking dinner. Have you all had pierogies? They are fast become a staple in this house. And, in between, there were toasted coconut mocha frappuccinos. Oh, my favorite kitchen activity today? Lunch. Avocado toast sprinkled with sea salt. So simple and delicious.

I think sometimes it's good to just stay in the house. If it's flooding outside, then it makes the decision easier.

It's close to bed time since 7am is work time. I suppose I'll say goodbye now.

I hope your weekend was less allergy-filled than mine, but just as full of friendship and food.

This is Day 32 of 100 Days of Blogging.

Shoot. I forgot yesterday. I turned off my blog alarm on Tuesday because it was going off at work and, well, the rest is history.

Yesterday was just a busy day. I spent most of it visiting various people: mom (we walked the bridge pictured over yonder), dad, boyfriend, doctor, mom (again!), sister, lots of friends. It was a good day. Of course, my room is a disaster, my laundry still isn't put away and I received by car taxes, but that's really neither here nor there.

Good news is - I have the weekend off! And I get to travel down to Savannah to see some of my very dear friends. It's going to rain, but that is ok. Rain is nothing coffee shops and Green Truck can't fix.

Does anybody have big weekend plans?

This morning at our morning meeting I shared my love of coconut with everyone. (Remember last post when I said I was currently obsessed? More like always obsessed.) Yesterday, I had two big coconut wins at (of all places) Walmart! I was finally able to get my grubby little paws on some of the new Chobani Flip! It is.... flippin' amazing! But seriously, Chobani has a product locator on their website and it helped me track down the Almond Loco Coco and the Key Lime Crumble. Enough about the Key Lime whatever - the Almond Loco Coco will blow your mind. Coconut flavored Greek yogurt with real coconut in it (on one side) and toasted almonds and dark chocolate chips to mix in (on the other side). I die. And, after I found that little gem, there was Coffee-Mate Coconut Creme. Are you kidding me?! Like a kid in the candy store. Maybe I bought 8 yogurts and a giant bottle of creamer. (And by maybe I mean I absolutely did.)

Summer is coming. Follow the coconut trail.

And, no, neither Coffee-Mate or Chobani endorsed me (although I'm certainly not opposed to the idea).

Well, enough about me and my obsessions. I'd love to hear from you all whether email, text, phone call or comment. I truly love to read you words as much as I hope you love to read mine!

This is Day 30 of 100 Days of Blogging.

Passion: noun 
strong and barely controllable emotion

What I've learned over the last three days... Passion requires fuel. It will not always be there when you need it - especially if you've overextended it or if you let it be overshadowed. I'm talking personal and professional passion. Passion is hard work.

What are you passionate about? How do you show it?

I'm currently....

Watching... Game of Thrones. I have to finish Season 2 before the next season begins March 31!

Eating... Liz Lemon Greek Frozen Yogurt by Ben & Jerry's. And homemade chocolate syrup I made so I can finally get around to experimenting with homemade Coconut Mocha Frapps!

Listening... to the new Justin Timberlake album. Thanks, Spotify!

Reading... Blogs. Oprah Magazine. And, still, The Fault in Our Stars.

Inspired by... People's belief in me. (I have a lot of personal cheerleaders! Thanks!)

Obsessed with... Yoga. Mint Green. Coconut. Egg salad. (Random. I know.)

This is Day 28 (27 went on vacation) of 100 Days of Blogging.

Just another manic Monday...

Today was a Monday like any other. I went to work at 7am and worked until 4ish. During those hours I counted things and rang out things and fixed issues as usual. I also was given the opportunity to practice my interviewee skills. That's not usual, but a wonderful experience.

After work, I finished watching the season finale of Girls on HBO. Oh goodness. I'm not sure how I feel about the way Lena had this season wrap up, but I have faith that it will come back strong in Season 3. Any Girls viewers in the crowd?

I headed to yoga for a sweaty flow workout. It was just what the doctor ordered after such a long weekend. And, when I got home, there was a huge mushroom and onion pizza from Andolini's waiting to greet me. How lucky am I?

Its been a laid back Monday which will be followed by what appears will be a very busy week. Yoga. Meeting new friends. Going to Savannah to see old friends. All good things. Busy, but good.

Hopefully, I will get through this week without a nervous breakdown like last week. Hopefully, by Thursday, I'll remember that's my day off because I keep telling people I work until 7. (Hello mind? Where did you go?)

The new Justin Timberlake album comes out tomorrow. Maybe I'm excited about that.

I'm probably going to finish Game of Thrones Season 2 this week. I'm definitely excited about that.

And everything else? Well, let's just wait and see what happens.

This is Day 26 of 100 Days of Blogging.

Tell me about what you did/learned this weekend...

This is Day 25 of 100 Days of Blogging. (25% complete!)

Sometimes days don't go exactly how you planned.

The beach isn't as beachy as you had hoped. You don't go see a movie, but instead crash a wedding reception. Your cardio changes from a leisurely walk to fast paced line dances.

I don't do well with rushing or last minute changes. It's something I've been battling my whole life. What I need to learn is, days may not got exactly how I plan, but days always end exactly how they should.

I'll get there one day.

This is Day 24 of 100 Days of Blogging.

I used to think I was a 75 year old trapped in a 27 year old body - just an old soul. However, now I know that my body is old, too. I started Couch 2 5k today. Let's just say running and I - we're not friends. And, here I am, in bed on a Friday night at 11:16pm wishing I had remembered to blog earlier so I could be asleep already. I'm just a 75 year old.

A 75 year old eating ranch tortilla Pop Chips in bed right now.

Onto other things... I'm trying to teach the cat to eat treats out of my hand. As it turns out, she's not that smart. Also, we went to see Crowfield play their last show tonight at Charleston Music Hall. (They're still playing, actually. See first paragraph as to why I am at home.) They're fantastic, so I wish I had listened to them sooner. If you have Spotify, you can get most of their discography. Check them out!

Tomorrow is one of my days off for the week, so I'm quite excited to get that started. I see yoga, the beach, and Oz in my future. And Abita Strawberry Harvest Beer? Yes, please! If I'm really lucky, I'll get to watch some Game of Thrones. And (because I know I'm really lucky) I'll get to start my day back to work with breakfast at Black Magic on Sunday.

Life is so good.

This is Day 23 of 100 Days of Blogging.

It appears I skipped Day 21 and headed straight to Day 22.

Sometimes you just have to move forward quickly. (However, I promise to try not to forget days again.)

Every night at 8pm, the alarm sounds and "blog!" appears across my iPhone screen, so it's normally not a problem. As a matter of fact, it even happened last night, but I found myself wrists deep in pie dough. I kept hitting snooze, but ended up with pie all over my phone and by the end of it all, well, I forgot. But you know that already.

So pie. I baked Apple Hand Pies by mixing this recipe from Joy the Baker with this recipe from A Cozy Kitchen. And then I vented them with pi symbols because today was Pi Day! 3.14. Get it? I like any reason to celebrate with baked goods, but being irrational is one of the best! (Bahaha. Irrational. Get it?) Oh geez.

Tonight, when the alarm went off, I was in the middle of a more hands-off oven activity - roasting brussels sprouts. (Which I am currently eating with a fried egg on top.) I LOVE brussels sprouts. They may very well be my favorite vegetable. I'm weird, I know. But if clean them, cut the bottoms off, and quarter them. Then drizzle with a little olive oil and garlic. Crack some pepper if you like. Then put them in the oven at 400 degrees for about 25 minutes. I flip them in the middle and sprinkle crunchy sea salt over them. Voila! Yummy roasted brussels sprouts and then throw an egg on top for protein.

Now, I want Cookie Dough Coconut Milk Ice Cream. Don't mind if I do/Let me just undo all of the good from yoga tonight.

In other news, I'm devastated about the decline of Google Reader. If any of you use it, then you feel my pain.

That's all I have for the interwebs tonight, plus it's my bedtime. xo.

This is Day 22 of 100 Days of Blogging. (RIP Day 21)