Thursday, February 23, 2012

My mom had a conversation about boys & dating & friends with my little sister the other day. She told her that she doesn't need to have a boyfriend to be someone or to be cool. She told her that she was a wonderful someone all on her own. And she reminded Rebecca that I didn't have a special someone right now or all of the time and she asked if Rebecca thought I was sad or had a bad life. Rebecca told my mom, "No. I think she's happy and has a really good life." And I do. Truly.

Occasionally, I feel lonely and want someone to take care of me when I'm sick or be my permanent date to sappy movies or to bring me flowers for no reason at all, but not all the time. My independence is empowering. My community is overwhelming and uplifting. I like who I am and I think other people do, too.

I think sometimes I forget why I am the way I am though. I wasn't born a nice and optimistic person. Those are traits that are cultivated. My good traits were grown and they were grown by Jesus. He was introduced to me at a young age and has stayed by my side ever since... through everything I  have done - good or bad. I am who I am because of Him. I want to be more like Him because he was a pretty amazing person. Not only because I believe He died for me (that's another fantastic thing in itself), but because he was kind, intelligent, and inviting. He was dynamic in creating life around Him! (I also like to think he was funny, but I can't prove it.) He was the kind of person this world needs more of and if that's what the world needs, then I want to be it.

"Let's go with Jesus. Not the gay-hating, war-making political tool of the Right, but the outcast, subversive, supreme adept who preferred the freaks and lepers and despised and doomed to the rich and powerful." - John Cusack (on his hero in Vanity Fair)


poptartyogini said...

What a beautiful post. I also think Jesus was funny. Smart people usually are. It is a comfort to know we are never alone even though I don't always remember. Hope you're feeling better!

Spudart said...

Most excellent blog post. It made me feel better.